My children are crime victims. Their whole lives have been altered but I ascribe a great deal of their healing and stability to our decision to be very honest about what happened to them, to all of us.
First, I found a wonderful counselor. She helped us so much to process the early pain and shock and devastation.
Second I remained very calm when asking them about their stories and I only asked brief questions spaced among games and regular conversation.
Next, I was honest about my emotion. I cried a lot. I expressed my anger, I listened to them and cried with them.
We learned to use writing to heal.
When first graders are murdered at school it is time for us all to give all of our children the gift of words, our time, and the truth.
We need to tell them what happened, listen to them, answer their questions honestly and teach them how to protect themselves.
I know I have. We face tomorrow together.