Tired

Of trying to keep them
All in cages
The carnivores
Herbivores
Omnivores
They pace back and forth
Eyeing me
Demanding to be
Let out
But how can I trust them?
I can’t

All I can do
Is warn the herbivores
Herd mentality people!
Watch out for the hungry
Looking wolves
Tigers
Bears
So many meat eaters
You guys have to stick together
Use the collective
No man left behind
But I am afraid
They will forget

So I keep the cages locked
And pace
Late into the night
Longing for freedom
For them/for me
Knowing there is
None.

The proof of God

Smarter men than me
Have set up mathematical equation
Proving God
But I am not even a man
That God should be mindful of me
I traveled the dark edges of my childhood
In summer storms
Light beneath the edges of doors
I ached to open
But could not
Who told you there were monsters in the closet?
Lingering beneath the bed?
What faith made you believe
That an array of stuffed
Animals could save you from them?

Nothing but stuffing

And…a…voice
So strong I cannot leave Him

What if hell

Was just
The absolute accumulation
Of all my worst behavior
Petty slights and jealousies
A mountain of bad words
A lifetime of hoarding
Or worse
All those ugly
Secret sins
The ones with names too defaced to utter
Aloud
Nightmares disguised as revenge
Rank unfaithfulness

Now turned on me
Alone
So the one abiding feeling
Is the keenest kind of pain–
Empathy
For all my own victims

What if hell itself
Is just a
Clumsy promenade
Of all the shoes i failed to walk in
For the miles
The endless miles
Of pain

What if

Hell was still
A burning pit outside Jerusalem
The city of peace
You would smell it first
The haunt of decay

We love decadence
We crave it
Forgetting about the eternal stench
Of death

Inescapable fire
The maw of the garbage truck
Roars and splutters
Leaving stink in the cloudless sky

We foolish mortals call freedom
Until it answers
Then we decry
The demise of our withered hearts

The home we have made
In the dark cavern
The grave

ordinary baptism

keeps happening:

Walle capsized in the shallows

he has lost his tail

and I must wade in

fish it out

and reattach

each time I descend

into the pool

in my ordinary clothing

I feel the force of water

baptism

the descent into the deep

and the washing away of all my sins

in the ordinary actions

of righting Polaris

 

He asks

For a story so I tell him

Once there was a boy who could not sleep.  He said, it is dark, tell me a story.  His mama said okay, and she told him this story–

Darkness is a blanket

And so is my voice

I would cover you softly and keep you close

So that we could stay safe